NFL Mystery File: Peyton Manning

During the dead time before NFL Training Camps open and the NCAA season begins, we’d like to explore some of the more perplexing mysteries from the National Football League. Up today, just what the heck is Peyton Manning doing when he is waving his arms around before the snap? Here are ten possibilities:

10. Just pointing out which body parts are powered by lasers and or rockets.

9. Performing an interpretive dance of how to get 30 lives in Contra.

8. Using sign language to deliver a MasterCard commercial to the non-hearing.

7. Arlen Specter is holding congressional investigations to find out.

6. Giving John Madden 30 more seconds to say something obvious.

5. He saw Tee Martin do it, and Peyton is a wee bit jealous for some reason.

4. Trying out for “Dancing With the Stars”.

3. Ed Hochuli told him too. Would you say no?

2. According to Bryant Gumbel, it’s all just part of his 5th Down routine.

1. It’s all a bunch of crap.

On Deck: Why did Shaun Alexander suck so bad last year?
In the hole: How does Norv Turner have a job?

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8 Responses to “NFL Mystery File: Peyton Manning”

  1. Anonymous says:

    I am sorry but this is stupid. New England fans are just jealous cause their team is just a pack of cheaters. Peyton Manning is twice the QB Tom Brady will ever be.

  2. BlueWorkhorse says:

    He’s obviously pointing out (one-by-one) each of the snipers he has hired to assure that no defensive player mess up his face and destroy all his commercial deals. Obviously.

  3. Catriona says:

    #7 lol

  4. Greg Adams says:

    Regarding Dancing with the Stars, have you seen Peyton run? I’d rather not see him rumba. Miss you on B/R, man. I’ll check you out here every so often. This Colt can handle it, Baby!Oh by the way, I’m leaning toward 1. NO ONE knows what the heck’s going on.

  5. James says:

    Now that was a good one… it hurts, but its funny.

  6. Anonymous says:

    He’s waving hello to his brother, who also kicked your ass.

  7. Mark says:

    #8 does seem the most likely.On the other hand he could be gesticulating wildly in a scarecrow-like manner lest some crows mistake his head for a potato (I know I do) and swoop in.

  8. Anonymous says:

    #9 is epic CONTRA!!!!!!!!

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